Character concepts

Cookie Monster barbarian. Take a moment for that to sink in. Cookie Monster barbarian. You are now incredibly terrified of the player that would make such a concept or think they have come up with the most awesome idea ever. One way or the other you can easily identify your GMing style.

I recently finished up the monstergame campaign I was running. The quote on the poster sums up my learning experience nicely. The group I ran this monstergame for optimizes a lot more than my saturday group. Which just means I'll have to run a tighter ship if I want to run for them again. Wednesday group blows the CR system out of the water even when they're only using tier 3 classes. As contrasted with saturday group whom I can tell, make a gestalt character using any and all sources and I'll still end up with a group who can be challenged by a smartly played CR relevant encounter. Such is life.

Now that monstergame is done I've been requested to run a sky pirates game. Sky Pirates will be replacing monstergame on wednesdays. I'll be switching gears away from D&D to run Sky Pirates with the PDQ# system. This should lower my mechanical workload. I will definitely need the lowered workload as the group assembling for Sky Pirates is promising to be even crazier than the group I have saturday night. I'm merely hoping to keep them from turning their first airship trip into a flying circus before the end of the first play session. After that, all bets are off.

Last set of quotes from monstergame:

Heikon: (( Oh snap, Frightful Moan ))

Onotole: (( Just don't moan when next to the succubus ))

Moastuo: (( aye, one lesbian is enough ))

Moastuo: (( are you trying to seduce me? ))

Onotole: (( Please don't seduce him ))

LooneyDM: There's a soft thud and something drops onto the jail floor.

Onotole: (( Ew, he pooped ))

Onotole: "I wonder if we could bottle the acid somehow."

LooneyDM: (( if only you had some vials ))

Onotole: (( This is a wizard's tower. We should have ALL the vials. ))

Mallexantus: (( The party is vial, evil and unrepentant. ))

LooneyDM: (( alright, let's roll ))

Mallexantus: « 1d20 = 11 »

* Moastuo rolls: 1d20 => 15

* Onotole rolls: 1d20 => 2

Onotole: ...

Onotole: Yep.

Mallexantus: "I am Mallexantus, Kyton of Jangling Hiter, bound by the old wizard to act as his jailer until his death freed me."

Moastuo: (( is it bad that I'm misreading that as jangling hitler? ))

Onotole: (( I always do. ))

Mallexantus: (( nope, everyone does. ))

Onotole: (( Mallexantus having a moustache makes him even better. ))

Mallexantus: « 1d20-2 = 20 - 2 = 18 » Ignorance: everything

Mallexantus: (( ... ))

Onotole: (( That's one hell of an ignorance roll ))

LooneyDM: As Lilith speaks the words from the book the obelisk begins to glow.

Temujin: "This should prove illuminating."

Temujin: (( YEEEEEEEEEEAH ))

Onotole: (( I see Lilith has aroused the pillar. ))

Soban (Hybrid Form): "Its a wizard. They do dumb things because they are bored."

Onotole: "I take offense to that."

LooneyDM out

Call Lightning

All the spell casting classes in D&D have their iconic spells. The wizard has fireball and magic missile. The cleric has cure wounds and turn undead (yeah yeah I know, not technically a spell). The druid has call lightning. Nothing quite says "Why yes nature is my mother and she's exceptionally displeased with you right now" more than one of the most concentrated destructive displays of nature's power directed at your person. Be afraid, for druids can make lightning strike twice. Or even more.

Yes, I'm aware of the typo. I'm too lazy to fix it.

LooneyDM out

Pyromancer (Back to fire)

Do you feel that burning sensation? Creeping up from inside you until it consumes your entire body? Yes. That's why you don't mess with the pyromancer. Especially not the female pyromancer. Really, why does anyone every think it's a good idea to mess with the pyromancer. It is however, a wonderful way to get burned.

Art is concept art from Dota 2

LooneyDM out

Sharks and PCs (Bonus post)

You know how player characters are. Given the slightest chance they'll jump the shark without the slightest hesitation. And spawn all sorts of ridiculous phrases.

Picture today from http://epicwinftw.com/

There's been a switch at the saturday morning game. We've mostly all rolled new characters and Cecilia has taken over as DM. Thus all incoming quotes where it says DM it means Cecilia. Our regular DM is playing the character named Gareth. Other switches

Goldielocks = Akuma

Tirah = Tsoria

Vimac = Ying Z

Quotes:

Ying Z: My character wants to hide under the bed.

Tsoria: Put on your big girl panties and let's go.

DM: Huge stone buttresses.

Gareth: heh heh, she said butt.

DM: The fog is very thick and everywhere.

Gareth: Can I cut it with a knife?

DM: I'm not going to have a skill challenge for you to bury the guy.

Ying Z: The gypsies are probably down by the river.

Looney & Tsoria: In a van!

Ying Z: Someone is in trouble, run away!

Akuma: I probe the gypsies.

DM: They ignore you.

Gareth: I'd ignore you too if a crystal alien was probing me.

Gareth: I was going to say "Put away your sword or you'll have a hammer in your skull."

DM: That would be diplomacy.

Gareth: I use athletics to flex and indimidate him. *rolls a 19* Welcome to the gun show!

Tsoria: Put those away honey.

Kiju: Your wife is dazed and knocked prone.

DM: He locks up your sword.

Gareth: That will be hard because I'm using a hammer.

Ying Z: We'll sleep, fetch Araynay, mount our horses

Gareth: I don't want to know what you do with your horse.

DM: This is about mood so I have to draw the map so you can fiddle with the bits.

Looney: If you can't fiddle your bits it's not old school D&D.

DM: I'll draw the stairs with an arrow showing which way you can go.

Gareth: You can only go one way on the stairs?

Kiju: I open the door and peek through, what do I see?

Gareth: You see us walk through the door.

Gareth: You're stealthy and we're the distraction.

Akuma: 6:06, that's off by an hour (note: it was 10:45)

Ying Z: The last fight damaged my character's psyche so much that she's now recklessly stupid.

Looney: I see (standing in a cloud of darkness)

Akuma: Actually you don't.

Kiju: Save the ranger.

Gareth: Save the world.

Kiju: You guys are married now. Consummate!

Tsoria: Ying Z always rolls more dice than anyone else.

Ying Z: I build my characters that way on purpose.

Gareth: Roll better, shake it more!

Tsoria: Do we get a synergy bonus since we're married.

Looney: You failed your save against ongoing stupidity.

Gareth: The new name for your Everburning torch is Everbursting torch.

Looney: You're a hunk of crystal.

Ying Z: A hunka hunka burning crystal.

LooneyDM out.

Too many dice

It's the truth. You can never have too many dice. And when you're Wil Wheaton you can ask everyone to help you acquire more. It's one of the amazing things you can do with a horde of geek fans. There are many other things you can do with a horde of geek fans but those will be discussed at a later date.

Art from here

LooneyDM out.

Dragonborn Mammaries

I know this is late to the party, but it's still worth the joke. I know I've commented on it in my games before. Especially when people are wondering what the gender of a humaniod is. Just look at the mini. If it has frontal lobes then its totally a female. Inescapable D&D logic right there.

Source is WotC D&D site

LooneyDM out.

My little flaming friend

I have no words to describe this flaming familiar or the funky fire tip crossbow she's wielding.

Art from here

LooneyDM out

Potion of Fire Breathing (fire related, what surprise)

Is your tank asking for ranged options? Is your bard feeling the blues? Have no fear, the magic item guide has your answer. Potion of Fire breathing! Rather than some half assed bow you can gran your tank a classy ranged weapon that really says "I'm the life of the party" rather than "plink plink plink". Your bard can stylize his performance with a real explosive ending. They're good for everyone! Imagine the enemies surprise when the entire party opens up with fire breathing. They'll know for certain that a good 16d6 fire damage hit them right where it hurt! Buy your potions today! Supplies limited so act now. Only 500 gp!*

*plus 600 gp shipping and handling

Art from here

LooneyDM out

Barbecue (fire related!)

This week I've had a burning passion to make posters about fire. Today's poster gives you a heads up on why the pyromancer should no longer be invited to barbecues. Open flame and pyromancers never mixes well. At least for everyone else. The pyromancer would say that everything went burningly wonderful. I think I need a book of pyromancer euphemisms. Stuff along the lines of "By the flames!" or "Prepare for fiery doom!" or "I've got a burning sensation!" It would be a tool for players every where, even if they weren't playing a pyromaniac.

I'll see how long I can keep up this fire theme so expect continued burning into next week with a light chance of raining ash.

Poster picture from failblog.com

LooneyDM out