Thursday, December 17, 2009

Lesbian Stripper Ninjas


Nothing like a scantily clad female leading ninja clad enemies on a merry rooftop chase through an oriental styled city late at night. At least not if you're trying to run a serious game. I'm sure there's a person out there who has used a character like the pictured lady in a serious campaign and not had it disrupt the seriousness. I can imagine it happening, but I'll abstain from that for now. You know there are players out there who are playing this character seriously. There are also people playing this character ironically. Shoot the first on site, and share cookies with the latter.

Saturday Night Game Quotes!:

Klo: dan is not the jerk?
Clementine: Dan is just feisty

Klo: we need to order the golem to roll around on the burning troll to heal him up

LooneyGM: After losing and regaining Pete they decided to stop for a rest, leaving the constructs on guard duty
Pete: I wasn't lost! I was exploring.

Pete: "GIMMIE A HUG YA TWAT!"

Atargatis: Okay, I think it's time we do something very important.
Atargatis: We need to give these Dreadguards names. Or at least Nicknames.
Steely Dan: I think we should just be honest here and start calling them "the bitches"
Clementine: do I get to run the bitches today?
Steely Dan: I think you've done a pretty good job so far
Pete: Bob and Bob.
Steely Dan: how about sexybitch and uglybitch?
Clementine: George and Carlin
Yuyuko: garfield and odie?
Steely Dan: calvin and hobbes!

LooneyGM: good you're all smaller than it
Clementine: i don't like when the DM says stuff like that...
Steely Dan: I sense that it will soon try to eat us
Steely Dan: I sense this with my "it's going to eat me" sense
Klo: im sure you'll feel right at home steely
Later after the monster grapples half the party
Steely Dan: wow, for once I am free and all of you are trapped

Atargatis: "So what's our next move?"
Clementine: "I wonder if someone put them all here or if they're on their own."
Atargatis: Check them for tags?

* Clementine holds the boat in her hands.... and then places it on the edge of the river.
* Clementine says... "HOKEY POKEY!"
* Steely Dan looks uncomfortable
* Atargatis sighs
* Atargatis picks up the boat
Clementine: waaait for it
Clementine: DM is typing.
LooneyGM: The boat expands from clementine's hands into a 10 foot long craft that spans the river.
Klo: ...Hokey Pokey?
Steely Dan: Atargatis has super strength! or is crushed by the boat!

Klo: girl only!
Steely Dan: you're a boy too Klo!
Clementine: nope, Klo did a sex change a while back because we kept insisting he was she.
Steely Dan: really? huh
LooneyGM: I thought she was joking about the sex change
Clementine: yeah. no?
Klo: Looney thinks im a girl :/
Clementine: Klo, what are you?
Klo: I have no idea now

* Clementine ties the rope to the golem
* Clementine rolls: 1d20 use rope => 4
* Clementine utterly fails to tie a knot.
Steely Dan: ...
Clementine: Um... help?
Clementine: My old fingers just aren't as skilled as they use to be...
Klo: ... Just ask the golem to hold one end of the rope? It can do that right?
* BEC rolls: 1d20+2 use rope => 1 + 2 = 3
* Clementine offers the rope to someone else.
Steely Dan: ...
Clementine: ...
* Steely Dan rolls: 1d20+1 use rope => 3 + 1 = 4
Atargatis: "It's been a while since I've done any knot-tying.
Clementine: Anyone else?
Steely Dan: ...
Clementine: ...
LooneyGM: the golem can hold the rope if it needs to

Atargatis: Only one left, it can't last long
LooneyGM: The mephit joins its fellows in the river
Atargatis: I can see the future!

LooneyDM out

2 comments:

  1. How did they get a golem? Those things are expansive.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have just downloaded iStripper, and now I enjoy having the sexiest virtual strippers on my desktop.

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